Friday, April 13, 2012

Rounding The Corner

I had my 32 week appointment yesterday.  I don't know what made the day so terrible.  Whether it was the appointment itself (though it really wasn't THAT horrible) or all the events that happened afterwards, but the day was pretty rotten and I didn't feel any sense of relief until I went to bed at 9pm.  

So my appointment was with the other doctor in the office.  There are two, and so far I had only been seeing the one.  And I'm learning that Dr. O is a bit more relaxed and a "let's just keep an eye on things" kind of doctor.  This appointment was with Dr. V and he's a bit more, "well there is a trend happening, so let's get on top of it and take a course of action".   

My weight is still very good.  I gained one pound in the last three weeks which is surprising considering the poor food choices going on in my house these last couple of weeks.  It seems like I go in spurts/phases with my eating.  I love vegetables.  Especially salads with tons of tomatoes.  I wish I was more of an avid gardener.  It would make keeping vegetables in the house easier.  Anyway, I hope I don't regret my poor eating choices throughout this pregnancy later on like at delivery time.  
The mess on her is totally how I felt inside.

Now comes the point where things take a different direction.  My first blood pressure was not to good at 145/89.  I had a feeling it was going to be high.  I've been lightheaded and feeling a heaviness in my body these past couple weeks.  Not consistently every day, but a couple times a week.  And yesterday happened to be one of those days.  So I rested for about 10 minutes or so and the nurse did a retake and it came down to 129/79.  Even with that retake, my numbers are slowly going up and if the trend continues we are facing induction.  No thank you!  I think going through three inductions already is enough for me.  And then Dr. V said it.  He put me back on Labetalol at the lowest dose to help keep my pressure from continuing the upward trend.  He asked me, "How do you feel about that?" And at the moment, in my tired and exhausted state (I hadn't slept decently since Saturday because of my youngest having croup) I at first had no words to say.  So my answer was, "Do we really need to?"  And he convinced me that we do to avoid pre-eclampsia from starting.  So far the only issue I have is my blood pressure (which is no big surprise), but if we start seeing protein in my urine then I'm almost certain an induction will happen.      

It was at this point I felt a bit defeated.  I have done so much reading over the past several years about pregnancies and how to handle rising blood pressure and such, that I was kicking myself for not being more proactive.  And to be totally honest, I felt a bit irritated that using a midwife is not an option.  I think a midwife would be more willing and more proactive about lifestyle changes and formulating a plan that does not include medicating right away.  But that is not an option so crying over spilled milk won't change things.  However, that doesn't mean I can't start making these changes anyway.  Now that our little boy is on the mend and I can get more sleep, I will be able to function better and make better choices.  

Baby's heart beat was good at 135 which is lower than it usually is, but Dr. V didn't seem concerned.  I am also measuring 2 weeks ahead at 34, but again he wasn't worried.  This is the first time though that I have ever measured ahead.  I had to ask my moms group on Facebook if this even meant anything because it was my first time experiencing it.  But alas (thankfully) it really does not mean much at all.  Although when he did measure and I was lying there, I could not believe how high my uterus was.  It's no wonder my ribs hurt, I have a hard time breathing when I am sitting, and it is difficult to drive.  This kid is either really long or he is fighting the cramped space and trying to say stretched out as much as possible.

So I go over to the pharmacy to pick up my prescription and there is an insurance issue.  Great.  One thing I loathe is dealing with insurance issues (who doesn't right?).  I was so tired that hearing the "bad news" of my insurance nearly sent me into tears.  Come to find out that all my insurance issues are due to paperwork or the lack there of.  Thank goodness for the modern technology of fax machines and gracious mothers who have them and are willing to pick up the paper work to send to the office.  My mother has been such a blessing over the last 32 weeks.  Anyway, unfortunately this isn't fast food and instant gratification does not happen, so we wait for the office to process the paperwork before they pay for the prescription.  

The afternoon didn't turn out much better.  The weather was crappy with dark clouds and rain off and on all day.  Which in turn turned the 2 and 4 year old girls into monsters.  Thus ensued headaches, sighs of exasperation, screaming and fighting (on the girls' part) and me wanting to run away.  Two words:  Big Sisters.  I am so glad to have the two big kids.  The oldest boy was on a field trip and did not arrive till around 5pm, but my oldest daughter came home, shared her Easter chocolate and took the two girls upstairs to watch a movie.  It was the first quiet I had experienced all day.  Though it was short lived, I reveled in it and simply sat and did nothing to calm myself down.  Later in the evening I was beyond exhausted.  It was a miracle that I was still functioning.  Unfortunately the idea of even pouring a bowl of cereal for the kids seemed like too much of a task, so again my mother was gracious enough to get us some food.  

Bed time for the little man and myself was 9pm and I slept for 10 hours (minus the 4 potty breaks).  I am feeling much better today; at least I'm not totally exhausted.  I still feel very weak, like I have been lifting weights or running a long distance.  Not sure what that means, but I'm hoping that getting myself re-hydrated again and eating properly will help alleviate that.  Thank goodness for new days.  Next appointment is in 2 weeks.